Eurovision

So tonight are the 'eagerly' awaited semi-finals for the Eurovision Song Contest. Every year we make a huge fuss about it and everyone gets really excited and we're convinced that we have the best song and we must win; then we don't and we criticisize the singer and point out all his/her mistakes with the song, the clothes, the backup dancers, the lighting, etc.

This year we've sent Chiara, again, singing What if we? I will admit that she has got a great voice, but it really does stop there. The song is boring and she's hardly eye-candy so we're not even going to get the male testosterone vote. The pity about Chiara is that she is so intent on winning this contest that she hasn't done much else with her singing career. I think you can book her to sing at your wedding and she'll probably charge you an arm and a leg but other than that, she's just a Eurovision starlet. She's probably be quite a hit on the Maury Povich sofa - she can open the waterworks very easily - that always brings in the viewers.

But tonight she's in Moscow and she's going to sing for Europe and represent Malta so we must offer our support, and if you're reading this and you're eligible to vote, then do give us 12 points and make a nation's dream come true. All it takes is one phonecall.